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The Political Consequences of Child Abuse
By Alice Miller, Ph.D.
Although centuries of novels and autobiographies have dealt with the
subject of child abuse in all its forms, society has been slow in
recognizing the frequency with which this assault is committed. Only in
the last twenty years has there been any real progress in this respect,
and most of it is due to the efforts of a small number of researchers
and above all to the media. Still underestimated and sometimes contested
are the consequences very early abuse will have for the victims in their
adult lives. The issues involved have been largely ignored, and there is
correspondingly little mention of them in historical and anthropological
studies. Thus sociologist Wolfgang Sovsky is able to write an otherwise
impressive work on forms of violence without making one single reference
to the childhood dimension. He gives very considerable space to the
willful infliction of suffering, calling it "mysterious,"
although it is readily explicable once we countenance the idea that the
bodies of the executioners, torturers and the orchestrators of organized
manhunts may have learned their fateful lessons very early and thus very
effectively.
Also Goldhagen restricts himself to a phenomenological discussion of
the people who volunteered to torture and humiliate others, without
giving any consideration to their childhood. He does devote much
attention to the emotions of the perpetrators, a subject hitherto
largely ignored, but without the background of their early upbringing
their behavior still remains mysterious. The reader seeks in vain for an
explanation. What made respected members of society suddenly act like
monsters? How could a former teacher like Klaus Barbie, and other men
described by their daughters as kind, caring fathers, have innocent
people tortured or indeed do the torturing themselves? Goldhagen does
not address this question. He is obviously convinced that references to
traditional anti-Semitism in Germany provide a satisfactory answer. They
do not.
The hypothesis that German anti-Semitism was the real reason for the
Holocaust has been rightly criticized by urging a comparison with the
First World War. At that time anti-Semitism was just as strong in
Germany but no organized genocide resulted. And why no Holocaust in the
other anti-Semitic countries‹Poland, Russia and other parts of Europe?
The argument that in the Weimar Republic unemployment and poverty caused
immense general frustration that was discharged via the mass murder of
the Jews is hardly convincing, given that Hitler was quickly successful
in getting unemployment under control.
There must have been other factors at play which have hitherto been
ignored, factors going some way to explaining why the Holocaust happened
in Germany and why it happened at this particular time rather than
another. In my view, one possible operative factor is the destructive
child-rearing style practiced widely on infants around the turn of the
century in Germany, a style I have no hesitation in referring to as a
universal abuse of infants.
Of course children in other countries have been and still are
mistreated in the name of upbringing or care giving, but hardly as
babies and hardly with the systematic thoroughness characteristic of the
Prussian pedagogy. In the two generations before Hitler's rise to power,
the implementation of this method was brought to a high degree of
perfection in Germany. With this foundation to build on, Hitler finally
achieved what he wanted: "My ideal of education is hard. Whatever
is weak must be hammered away. In the fortresses of my militant order a
generation of young people will grow to strike fear into the heart of
the world. Violent, masterful, unafraid, cruel youth is what I want.
Young people must be all that. They must withstand pain. There must be
nothing weak or tender about them. The free-magnificent predator must
flash from their eyes again. I want them strong and beautiful...That way
I can fashion things anew." This education program revolving on the
extermination of everything life-giving was the forerunner of Hitler's
plans for the extermination of an entire nation. Indeed it was the
prerequisite for the ultimate success of his designs.
The numerous and widely-read tracts by Dr. Daniel Gottlieb Moritz
Schreber, the inventor of the Schrebergärten (the German world for
small allotments) are of major interest here. Some of them ran to as
many as 40 editions, and their central concern was to instruct parents
in the systematic upbringing of infants from the very first day of life.
Many people motivated by what they thought to be the best of intentions
complied with the advice given them by Schreber and other authors about
how best to raise their children if they wanted to make them into model
subjects of the German Reich. They did this without even remotely
suspecting that they were exposing their children to a systematic form
of torture with long-term effects. Germany sayings and catch-phrases
like "Praise be to the things that make us tough" and
"What doesn't kill us will strengthen us," still to be heard
from educationists of the old school, probably originated in this
period.
Morton Schatzman, who quotes highly enlightening passages from
Schreber's writings, is of the opinion that here we are in the presence
not of child-raising methods but of systematic instruction in child
persecution. One of Schreber's convictions is that when babies cry they
should be made to desist by the use of "physically perceptible
admonitions," assuring his readers that "such a procedure is
only necessary once, or at the most twice, and then one is master of the
child for all time. From then on, one look, one single threatening
gesture will suffice to subjugate the child." Above all, the
newborn child should be drilled from the very first day to obey and to
refrain from crying.
Today, people who have been brought up in anything even remotely
approaching a humane way will hardly be able to imagine the rigor and
tenacity with which Schreber himself implemented this program.
Psychoanalyst Wilhelm G. Niederland quotes examples that cast light on
the everyday practical conduct of child-rearing in those decades; for
example, recipes for inculcating the "art of self-denial" into
infants. "The method should be simple and effective: the child is
placed on the lap of its nanny while the latter is eating or drinking
whatever takes her fancy. However urgent the infant's oral needs may
become in this situation, they must not be gratified."
Niederland quotes an account by Schreber from his own family life. A
nanny eating pears while holding one of his children on her lap was
unable to resist the temptation of giving the infant a slice. She was
immediately dismissed. The news of this draconian measure quickly spread
to all the other nannies in Leipzig, and from that time on, writes
Schreber, he "never again encountered such insubordination, neither
with that child or with any of the others that came later."
Contrary to received opinion prevalent as recently as 15 years ago,
the human brain at birth is not fully developed. The abilities a
person's brain develops depend on experiences in the first three years
of life. Studies on abandoned and severely mistreated Romanian children
revealed striking lesions in certain areas of the brain and marked
emotional and cognitive insufficiencies in later life. According to very
recent neurobiological findings, repeated traumatization leads to an
increased release of stress hormones that attack the sensitive tissue of
the brain and destroy existing neurons. Other studies of mistreated
children have revealed that the areas of the brain responsible for the
management of emotion are 20 to 30 percent smaller than in normal
persons.
The children systematically subjected to obedience drill around the
turn of the century were not only exposed to corporal
"correction" but also to severe emotional deprivation. The
upbringing manuals of the day described physical demonstrations of
affection such as stroking, cuddling and kissing as indications of a
doting, mollycoddling attitude. Parents were warned of the disastrous
effects of spoiling their children, a form of indulgence entirely
incompatible with the prevalent ideal of rigor and severity. As a
result, infants suffered from the absence of direct loving contact with
the parents. The best they could hope for was to find some kind of
substitute from the servants, who in numerous cases used and exploited
them as objects of pleasure, thus frequently adding to the child's
emotional confusion.
Since the experiments conducted on monkeys by Dr. Harlow in the
Fifties, we know that animals raised by artificial "robot"
mothers later turned aggressive and showed no interest in their own
offspring. New research on macaque monkeys revealed that they kill even
members of their own species if they are brought up without appropriate
care. John Bowlby's studies on the absence of early attachment in
delinquents and René Spitz' descriptions of small children dying of
hospitalism following emotional neglect during hospitalization under
extremely hygienic conditions are indications that not only animal but
also human babies require reassuring sensory contact with their parents
if socialization is to take a normal course.
The findings presented by Bowlby and Spitz almost 40 years ago are
corroborated by recent neurobiological research. The studies in question
suggest that not only active battering but also the absence of loving
physical contact between child and parent will cause certain areas of
the brain, notably those responsible for the emotions, to remain
underdeveloped. Hence the children "subjugated by looks"
suffered emotional harm that was only to develop its full destructive
potential in the next generation.
Present-day neurobiological research makes it easier for us to
understand the way Nazis like Eichmann, Himmler, Höss and others
functioned. The rigorous obedience training they underwent in earliest
infancy stunted the development of such human capacities as compassion
and pity for the sufferings of others. They were incapable of emotion in
the face of misfortune - such feelings were alien to them. Their total
emotional atrophy enabled the perpetrators of the most heinous crimes
imaginable to function "normally" and to continue to impress
their environment with their efficiency in the years after the war
without the slightest remorse. Dr. Mengele could perform the most cruel
experiments on Jewish children in Auschwitz and then live for 30 years
like a "normal", well-adjusted man.
In the absence of positive factors, affection and helping witnesses,
the only course open to the mistreated individual is the disavowal of
personal suffering and the idealization of cruelty with all its
devastating after-effects. Undergoing an exceedingly humiliating and
cruel upbringing at the preverbal stage, usually without helping
witnesses, may instill into the victim admiration of this cruelty if
there is no one in the immediate vicinity of the child to query those
methods and stand up for humane values. People subjected to mistreatment
in childhood may go on insisting all their lives that beatings are
harmless and corporal punishment is salutary although there is
overwhelming, indeed conclusive evidence to the contrary. Vice versa, a
child protected, loved and cherished from the outset will thrive on that
experience for a lifetime.
Binjamin Wilkomirski, the author of a harrowing and intensely
illuminating book about his childhood in the concentration camps, once
confided to me in a personal encounter some observations made with the
eyes of an imprisoned but extremely wide-awake child on the behavior of
the female camp guards. He said that it had taken him 50 years to
inquire who those "blokowas" really were, those women who had
so openly and unreservedly relished the job of tormenting and
humiliating Jewish children and subjecting them to every conceivable
variety of mental and physical cruelty.
To his astonishment, perusal of the trial records revealed that most
of them were young women between 19 and 21 who had formerly had quite
ordinary jobs as seamstresses or sales clerks and whose biographies
contained nothing in any way unusual. During the trial they unanimously
claimed that they had not been aware that Jewish children were human
beings. The conclusion that immediately suggests itself is that
ultimately propaganda and manipulation are sufficient to transform
people into sadistic executioners and mass murderers.
This is not an opinion I share. On the contrary. It is my belief that
only men and women who had experienced mental and physical cruelty in
the first weeks and months of life and had been shown no love at all
could possibly have let themselves be made into Hitler's willing
executioners. As Goldhagen's archive material shows, they needed next to
no ideological indoctrination because their bodies knew exactly what
they wanted to do as soon as they were allowed to follow their
inclinations. And as the Jews, young or old, had been declared
non-persons, there was nothing to stop them indulging those
inclinations. But no amount of indoctrination alone, at school or
wherever, will unleash hatred in a person who has no preconditions in
that direction. It is well known that there were also Germans, like Karl
Jaspers, Hermann Hesse or Thomas Mann, who immediately recognized the
declaration that Jews were non-persons as an alarm signal and the
rallying cry of untrammeled barbarism.
For people like the "blokowas," exposed to emotional
confusion in their early childhood, the declaration was a highly
convenient expedient. All they needed to do was refuse the children
water to wash themselves and that gave them sufficient reason to hate
them for being dirty and coal-black. They could toss lumps of sugar to
starving children and then despise them for the alacrity with which they
scrambled to pick them up. Those young women could turn the children
into precisely what they needed to feel powerful and could thus vent on
their victims the old, unconscious rage slumbering within them.
However brutally these people were brought up, they showed no
immediate signs of the harm done to them. On the contrary, many of them
grew up into seemingly well-adjusted young people. But sooner or later -
usually one generation later - when the tormented children had
themselves become parents, the former victims did the same with their
children as had been done to them, with no feelings of guilt. It was the
only thing they knew, after they had repressed and denied their own
pain.
Studying child abuse confronts us with the astonishing fact that
parents will inflict the same punishment or neglect on their children as
they experienced themselves in their early lives. But as adults they
have no recollection of what they went through. In the case of sexual
assault on children, it is quite usual for the perpetrators to have no
conscious knowledge of their own early life history or at the least to
be cut off from the attendant feelings aroused by those experiences. It
is not until they are in therapy (always supposing they are given any)
that it transpires that they have been reenacting what they went through
as children.
The sole explanation I can advance for this fact is that information
on the cruelty suffered in childhood remains stored in the brain in the
form of unconscious memories. For a child, conscious experience of such
treatment is impossible. If children are not to break down completely
under the pain and the fear, they must repress that knowledge. But the
unconscious memories drive them to reproduce those repressed scenes over
and over again in the attempt (and with the false hope) to liberate
themselves of the fears that cruelty and abuse have left with them. The
victims create situations in which they can assume the active role in
order to master the feeling of helplessness and escape the unconscious
anxieties.
But this liberation is a specious one because the effects of the past
don't change as long as they remain unnoticed. Over and over again the
perpetrator will go in search of new victims. As long as one projects
hatred and fear onto scapegoats, there is no way of coming to terms with
those feelings. Not until the cause has been recognized and the natural
reaction to wrongdoing understood can the blind hatred wreaked on
innocent victims be dissipated. The function it performs, that of
masking the truth, is no longer necessary. Sex criminals who have worked
through their lives in therapy may no longer run the risk of a
destructive reenactment of their traumas.
What is hatred? As I see it, it is a possible consequence of the rage
and despair that cannot be consciously felt by a child who has been
neglected and mistreated even before he or she has learned to speak. As
long as the anger directed at a parent or other first caregiver remains
unconscious or disavowed, it cannot be dissipated. It can only be taken
out on oneself or stand-ins, on scapegoats such as one's own children or
alleged enemies. Sympathetic observation of the cries of an infant
brings home forcibly to the onlooker how intense the feelings involved
must be. The hatred can finally work as a lifesaving defense against the
life-threatening powerlessness.
The studies at my disposal already in 1980 and referred to in my book
For Your Own Good confirmed my conjecture that, both in Nazi Germany
and among the professional American soldiers who voluntarily served in
Vietnam, brutally-raised children figured prominently among the most
vindictive war criminals. Further confirmation was brought by study of
the childhood biographies of those exceptional people who in times of
terror had the courage to rescue others from extermination.
Why were there people brave enough to risk their lives to save Jews
from Nazi Persecution? Much scientific inquiry has been expended on this
question. The usual answers revolve around religious or moral values
such as Christian charity or a sense of responsibility instilled in them
by parents, teachers and other caregivers. But there is no doubt that
the active supporters of the extermination and the passive hangers-on
had usually also been given a religious upbringing. So this can hardly
furnish a sufficient explanation.
I was convinced that there must have been some special factor in the
childhood of the rescuers, in the prevailing atmosphere of their
childhood, that made it so fundamentally different from what the war
criminals had experienced, but at first I couldn't prove my hypothesis.
For years I sought in vain for a book that would give this subject
adequate coverage. Finally, thanks to Lloyd deMause's help, I found an
empirical study by the Oliners, The Altruistic Personality: Rescuers
of Jews in Nazi Europe, based on interviews with more than 400
witnesses of those dark days. It confirmed my hypothesis. The study
concluded that the only factor distinguishing the rescuers from the
persecutors and hangers-on was the way they had been brought up by their
parents.
Almost all rescuers interviewed reported that their parents had
attempted to discipline them with arguments rather than punishment. They
were only rarely subjected to corporal punishment, and if they were it
was invariably in connection with some misdemeanor and never because
their parents had felt the need to discharge some uncontrollable and
inexplicable feeling of rage on them. One man recalled that he had once
been spanked for taking smaller children out onto a frozen lake and
endangering their lives. Another reported that his father had only ever
hit him once and apologized afterwards. Many of the statements might be
paraphrased thus: "My mother always tried to explain what was wrong
about whatever it was I had done. My father also spent a lot of time
talking to me. I was impressed by what he had to say."
What a different picture we get from the reports of the persecutors
and hangers-on: "When my father was drunk he took the whip to me. I
never knew what I was being beaten for. Often it was for something I had
done months before. And when mother was in a temper she tore into anyone
who got in her way, including me."
Unlike such uncontrolled affective discharges subjectively felt to be
justified, explaining what the parent feels is wrong is synonymous with
trust in the otherwise good intentions of the child. Such a course is
motivated by respect and faith in the child's ability to develop and
change its behavior for the better.
People given early affection and support are quick to emulate the
sympathetic and autonomous natures of their parents. Common to all the
rescuers were self-confidence, the ability to take immediate decisions
and the capacity for empathy and compassion with others. Seventy percent
of them said that it only took them a matter of minutes to decide they
wanted to intervene. Eighty percent said they did not consult anyone
else. "I had to do it, I could never have stood idle and watched
injustice being done."
This attitude, prized in all cultures as "noble," is not
something instilled in children with fine words. If the behavior
actually displayed by caretakers is such as to contradict their own
words, if children are spanked in the name of lofty ideals, as is still
the custom in some parochial schools, then those elevated sentiments are
doomed to go unheard or even to provoke rage and violence. The children
may end up aping those high-minded phrases and mouthing them in later
life, but they will never put them into practice because they have no
example to emulate.
Martin Luther, for example, was an intelligent and educated man, but
he hated all Jews and he encouraged parents to beat their children. He
was no perverted sadist like Hitler's executioners. But 400 years before
Hitler he was disseminating this kind of destructive counsel. According
to Eric Ericson's biography, his mother beat him severely before he was
treated this way by his father and his teacher. He believed this
punishment had "done him good" and was therefore justified.
The conviction stored in his body that if parents do it then it must be
right to torment someone weaker than yourself left a much more lasting
impression on him than the divine commandments and the Christian
exhortations to love your neighbor and be compassionate toward the weak.
Similar cases are discussed by Philip Greven in his highly
informative book, Spare the Child. He quotes various American men
and women of the church recommending cruel beatings for infants in the
first few months of life as a way of ensuring that the lesson thus
learnt remains indelibly impressed on them for the rest of their lives.
Unfortunately they were only too right. These terrible destructive texts
which have misled so many parents are the conclusive proof of the
long-lasting effects of beating. They could only have been written by
people who were exposed to merciless beatings as children and later
glorified what they had been through. Fortunately, these books were not
published in 40 editions in the USA.
An animal will respond to attack with "fight or flight."
Neither course is open to an infant exposed to aggression from immediate
family members. Thus the natural reaction remains pent up, sometimes for
decades, until it can be taken out on a weaker object. Then the
repressed emotions are unleashed against minorities. The targets vary
from country to country. But the reasons for that hatred are probably
identical the world over.
We know that as a boy Hitler was tormented, humiliated and mocked by
his father, without the slightest protection from his mother. We also
know that he denied his true feelings toward his father. The real
sources of his hatred thus become obvious. I have gone in search of the
true motives not only for Hitler's mental make-up but also that of many
other dictators. In all of them I identified the effects of hatred of a
parent that remained unconscious not only because hating one's father
was strictly prohibited but also because it was in the interests of the
child's self-preservation to maintain the illusion of having a good
father. Only in the form of a deflection onto others was hatred
permitted, and then it could flow freely. Hitler would hardly have found
so much support if the "care-giving" patterns he had been
exposed to and their detrimental after-effects had not been so
widespread in Germany and Austria.
But Hitler's specific problems with the Jews can in fact be traced
back to the period before his birth. In her youth, his paternal
grandmother had been employed in a Jewish merchant's household in Graz.
After her return home to the Austrian village of Braunau, she gave birth
to a son, Alois, later to become Hitler's father, and received
child-support payments from the family in Graz for 14 years. This story,
which is recounted in many biographies of Hitler, represented a dilemma
for the Hitler family. They had an interest in denying that the young
woman had been left with child either by the Jewish merchant or his son.
On the other hand, it was impossible to assert that a Jew would pay
alimony for so long without good reason. Such generosity on the part of
a Jew would have been inconceivable for the inhabitants of an Austrian
village. Thus the Hitler family was faced with the insoluble dilemma of
devising a version that would serve to nullify their
"disgrace."
For Alois Hitler the suspicion that he might be of Jewish descent was
insufferable in the context of the anti-Jewish environment he grew up
in. All the plaudits he earned himself as a customs officer were
insufficient to liberate him from the latent rage at the disgrace and
humiliation visited on him through no fault of his own. The only thing
he could do with impunity was to take out this rage on his son Adolf.
According to the reports of his daughter of his former marriage, Angela,
he beat his son mercilessly every day. In an attempt to exorcise his
childhood fears, his son nurtured the maniac delusion that it was up to
him to free not only himself of Jewish blood but also all Germany and
later the whole world. Right up to his death in the bunker, Hitler
remained a victim of this delusion because all his life his fear of his
half-Jewish father had remained locked in his unconscious mind.
I have set out these ideas in greater detail in my book For Your
Own Good. Many people have told me that they found them highly
unsettling and in no way sufficient to explain Hitler's actions. Not all
his actions, perhaps, but certainly his delusions. And those delusions
are at the very least the foundation of his actions. I can certainly
picture the boy Hitler swearing vengeance on "the Jews," those
monstrous fantasy-figures of an already diseased imagination.
Consciously, he probably thought he could have led a happy life if
"the Jew" had not plunged his grandmother into the disgrace
that he and his family had to live with. And it was this that in his
eyes served to excuse the batterings he received from his father, who
after all was himself a victim of the evil and omnipotent Jew. In the
mind of an angry, seriously confused child, it is only a short step from
there to the idea that all Jews should be exterminated.
Not only Jews. In the household of Hitler's family lived for years
the very unpredictable schizophrenic aunt Johanna, whose behavior is
reported to be very frightening to the child. As an adult, Hitler
ordered killed every handicapped and psychotic person, to free German
society from this burden. Germany seemed for him to symbolize the
innocent child who had to be saved. Consequently, Hitler wanted to
protect his nation from the dangers he himself had had to face. Absurd?
Not at all. For an unconscious mind, this kind of symbolization might
sound very normal and logical.
Besides the sources of his fears connected with father and aunt,
there was his early relationship with his very intimidated mother who
lived in constant fear of her husband's violent outbursts and beatings.
She called him "Uncle Alois" and endured patiently his
humiliating treatment without any protest. Adolf's mother had lost her
first three children due to illness, and Adolf was the first child to
survive infancy. We can easily imagine that the milk he drank from his
mother was in a way "poisoned" by her own fear. He drank her
milk together with her fears, but was of course unable to understand or
to integrate them. These irrational fears (that an observer, watching
his speeches on videos can easily recognize) stayed unrecognized and
unconscious to Hitler until the end of his life. Stored up in his body,
they drove him constantly to new destructive actions, in his endless
attempts to find an outcome.
In the lives of all the tyrants I examined, I found without exception
paranoid trains of thought bound up with their biographies in early
childhood and the repression of the experiences they had been through.
Mao had been regularly whipped by his father and later sent 30 million
people to their deaths, but he hardly ever admitted the full extent of
the rage he must have felt toward his own father, a very severe teacher
who had tried through beatings to "make a man" out of his son.
Stalin caused millions to suffer and die because even at the height of
his power his actions were determined by unconscious infantile fear of
powerlessness. Apparently his father, a poor cobbler from Georgia,
attempted to drown his frustration with liquor and whipped his son
almost every day. His mother displayed psychotic traits, was completely
incapable of defending her son and was usually away from home either
praying in church or running the priest's household. Stalin idealized
his parents right up to the end of his life and was constantly haunted
by the fear of dangers that had long since ceased to exist but were
still present in his deranged mind. The same might be true of many other
tyrants. The groups of people they singled out for persecution and the
rationalization mechanisms they employed were different in each case,
but the fundamental reason behind it was probably identical. They often
drew on ideologies to disguise the truth and their own paranoia. And the
masses chimed in enthusiastically because they were unaware of the real
motives, including those operative in their own biographies. The
infantile revenge fantasies of individuals would be of no account if
society did not regularly show such naive alacrity in helping to make
them come true.
Naturally, my references to Schreber and his methods are not
sufficient to explain the history of the Holocaust. Countless books have
been written about it, but the enormity of those crimes still defies
comprehension. Much more research needs to be done before we can even
start to truly understand. Given what we know today, attempting to build
an explanation around any one single factor would result in crass
oversimplification. It leaves too many other things out of account.
Also, such a monocausal explanation might lead to an exoneration of the
perpetrators, relieving them of their responsibility by declaring them
sick. No upbringing, however cruel, is a license for murder. But blaming
the whole thing on a defective genetic blueprint is just as
unsatisfactory. Why should there have been so many people born 30 or 40
years before the Holocaust in Germany with such a fateful genetic
disposition? I do not know of any gene researcher who would have tried
to answer this question.
My references to the systematic humiliation of children around the
turn of the century and the torture small infants were exposed to
(tragically never recognized as such by the parents) seem to me,
however, to be an important element within the complex concatenation of
causes. Unfortunately it has yet to be given the attention it deserves.
The reasons for this neglect are probably closely connected with the
general taboo that has been imposed on the subject of childhood. But for
quite hardheaded pragmatic reasons, notably a concern for the future, it
is important to break with this taboo and venture onto this largely
unexplored territory.
The total neglect or trivialization of the childhood factor operative
in the context of violence and the way it evolves in early infancy
sometimes leads to explanations that are not only unconvincing and
abortive but actively deflect attention away from the genuine roots of
violence. The abstract term "anti-Semitism" contains an
infinite number of meanings and frequently only serves to blur the
complicated psychological processes involved, processes that need to be
identified and called by name. Only in this way can we hope to change
anything.
In my view, a close comparison of parenting methods today and in the
past can bring about such a change. It can open up new vistas and
encourage the formation of new and healthier structures in raising
children. Many new enlightening books on parent-child relations are
instances of concrete help for parents in incorporating the information
at our disposal into the practice of child-rearing. Parents who are able
to integrate this new information are likely to find it easier to
respect, encourage, understand and love their children and to learn from
them.
But working toward a better, more aware future cannot be done in
isolation from the ongoing attempt to understand our history in all its
facets, for us as individuals and as society. The work started by Lloyd
deMause and continued by him and other psychohistorians is to my
knowledge the first systematic research in this direction. The history
of child-rearing might be more illuminating than many others in
illustrating the dangers for society at large attendant on willful
ignorance about child development. The ongoing research on babies from
birth to three might be helpful for eventually overcoming this
ignorance. It may enable some historians to raise more frequently the
question raised for the first time by Lloyd deMause: what does it feel
like to be an abused infant, without any enlightened witnesses?
Unfortunately, the early childhood of people who recently mercilessly
killed in Rwanda has not yet become an issue for psychological or
sociological investigation. But should empathic psychohistorians once
become interested in finding out and describing the atmosphere of the
first years of the killer's life, they could probably be able to explain
some of the events that still seem inexplicable.
This article was written as the
Distinguished Lecture for the 21st Annual International Psychohistorical
Association Convention in New York City, and contains parts of her new
book, Paths of Life: Seven Scenarios (Pantheon
Books, 1998). It also appeared in The
Journal of Psychohistory 26 (2), Fall 1998. |